"It's Not Good News."

She's so calm. Her clear blue eyes don't give anything away. She's sitting at this horrendous oval dinner table (more on that later), ear against her phone against her shoulder, hands on either side of the place mat, and I'm suddenly five years old.

"Is four days going to make a difference?"

She stares at her hands. It is November, but as far as Virginia is concerned, it's the hottest day of the month. My ears ring as she says, "They found a mass."

But let me back up.

Prior to the first tumor, or the pain, there was a woman named Sharon, who was deeply in love with a man named Ed.

Their love story was....complicated.

Sharon and Ed first met while Sharon was still in high school (le scandal! But it was 1960s Brooklyn). Sharon was off to nursing school, and Ed ran a pet store. They met at a dance (presumably, she's asleep so clearly she can't refute), and in what I presume to be a "Back To The Future, Enchantment Under The Sea" moment, fell in love and eventually married in August of 1964.

Here's my mom at their wedding. So cute, I can't imagine what they looked like in real life:

Oh hey girl haaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy

So they married, and had three adorable blue-eyed children (Jim, Edward, and Alison). And thus began the drama, #RHOBH (is that it? I don't understand Bravo) doesn't hold a candle.